…but why would anyone want to build this?

Spotted at a pub in Penrith by yours truly. And for the record, I like going to the toilet alone.

1. Put 400 bricks in a closed room.

2. Put your new employees in the room and close the door.

3. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours.

4. Then analyse the situation:

a. If they are counting the bricks, put them in the Accounting Department.
b. If they are recounting them, put them in Auditing.
c. If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks, put them in Engineering .
d. If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order, put them in Planning.
e. If they are throwing the bricks at each other, put them in Operations.
f. If they are sleeping, put them in Security.
g. If they have broken the bricks into pieces, put them in Information Technology.
h. If they are sitting idle, put them in Human Resources.
i. If they say they have tried different combinations, they are looking for more, yet not a brick has been moved, put them in Sales.
j. If they have already left for the day, put them in Marketing.
k. If they are staring out of the window, put them in Strategic Planning.
l. If they are talking to each other, and not a single brick has been moved, congratulate them and put them in Management
m. Finally, if they have surrounded themselves with bricks in such a way that they can neither be seen nor heard from, put them in Senior Management .

Following up on the last post…welcome to the Buffet Box, at the corner of the Merrion Centre.

the smallest kitchen in the world…I swear its smaller than the one I had in my old apartment!Yes, we were on one enf of the restaurant/cafe and the kitchen was on the other end. That was how small it was.

For those not in the know..this is the Leeds version of the Malaysian nasi lemak. Hmm.Seriously, beggars cant be choosers. The sambal is a tad sweet,but other than that it was actually pretty authentic. A side of chicken and potato curry that came with it suprisingly does not taste indian (like all curries here) but with the distinctive taste of coconut milk, just like home. The rice don’t taste coconutty..which was pretty strange. But overall it was not bad for £4.50, and beggars can’t be choosers. Will definately go back for lunch as my workplace is only 2 minutes walk away.

Penang Assam Laksa. A little lack of ‘heh-koh’ (shrimp paste) but not bad. May have come out from a Hup Leong packaged powder mix. I think it’s made with flaked canned tuna!! Clever idea - I hate making assam laksa because of the lack of fish here,but now I might just try it out with flaked canned tuna.

Overall, not bad for £10 for two. Not the best best in the world, but totally edible. Would definately return especially towards freezing winter - Bah Kut Teh for lunch…yummmz.

its been raining all day today…walking to work required me juggling an umbrella and a huge sling bag, getting my birkenstocked feet soaked and my jeans dipped into the puddles that inevitably form everytime it rains.

Its grey, and possibly the coldest day we’ve had since March. The skies are grey and unwelcoming, and I am seriously getting withdrawal symptoms from cutting down on coffee. I only brought with me a thin hoodie and will probably be frozen when I leave the office later.

But.

Every morning as I walk into work I pass this dodgy 10*10 ft ‘cafe’. It serves bacon sandwiches in the am and fluoroscent sweet and sour chicken for lunch. Seedy looking white customers sit there for endless cups of coffee, being served by the equally seedy looking chinese owners/servers.

Today they had something pasted on the wall that caused me to do a double, triple take

Malaysia food, served from 1pm

NASI LEMAK, Assam Laksa & something-else-i-didnt-catch

omg omg omg omg omg..so happy happy joy joy…its like all my dreams come true. It still feels like a dream, so I am going to drop by again later and take a picture of that sign,just so that I know I was not dreaming. Guess where am I having lunch tomorrow? Heh.

Did you know…

..that Budweiser, the original American beer, is actually Czech?? Please welcome Budvar..

my favourite Budvar dark:

It is produced in the same manner as original Premium Lager with the use of the finely selected Žatec hop, Moravian melt, water from 300 m deep Artesian wells and three types of special colour barley malt: munich, caramel and roasted. It is characterized by its significant bark colour, dry, fine bitter caramel flavour without dominant sweetness, The flavour is made delicious by the roasted malt.

At CZ48 for a pint, this pint cost about £0.80…Ahhh..what else do you need?

Michael Buerk watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1’s UK eclipse coverage remarked: “They seem cold out there, they’re rubbing each other and he’s just come in his shorts.

Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: “Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.”

Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: “Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis’s misses every chance he gets.”

Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edwards’ tyre choice on World superbike racing: “Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now.”

Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel on This
Morning: “She was practising fastest finger first by herself in bed last night.”

Winning Post’s Stewart Machin commentating on jockey Tony McCoy’s formidable lead: “Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees.”

Ross King discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond: “Well Phil tell us about your amazing third leg.”

Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe: “With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off.”

Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: “There’s nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this.”

James Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Grand Prix, asked: “What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Rubens Barrichello?”

Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: “Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69.”

Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big race when he said: “They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from different positions.”

Steve Leonard, talking about vegetation on Vets In The Wild, told Trude:
“There’s something big growing between my legs.”

Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live
said:
“You’d eat beaver if you could get it.”

A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn’t, turned to the weatherman and asked, “So Bob, where’s that eight inches you promised me last night?” Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

US PGA Commentator - “One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them… Oh my God!!!!! What have I just said?!!!!”

Ted Walsh- Horse Racing Commentator - “This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.”

New Zealand Rugby Commentator - “Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.”

Pat Glenn - Weightlifting commentator - “And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!”

Its been a week and a half since I started my new non-chandelier job. Obviously there is not much I will disclose but here are my thoughts……

1) You don’t realize how much you appreciate the security of a large corporation until you’ve left it. Discounts on products, annual reviews…ahhh..bliss.
2) I was probably the only person who thoroughly enjoyed doing my annual anti money laundering training. Lots have changed since 2005
3) I have to pay £0.10 for a cup of hot water
4) I have no fridge NOR microwave. I had never worked in a place without either before
5) I walk past McDonalds every morning. So far I had succumbed 3 times.Oh noes!
6) My bus stops outside Starbucks every morning. So far I had succumbed once - a treat on my first day before I was stung by a bee
7) Back to drinks, I calculated that if I were to pay £0.20 for a cup of coffee (£0.50 for posh coffees) , I would spend about £10 each month. Again, first time I have to pay for my own drinks.
Therefore I am now the proud owner of a thermos. Reminds me of college days
9) My job consists of reading news feeds for an hour a day
10) I should be lucky if I get to travel once a year with work
11) I had never worked in a place where EVERYONE that you meet actually enjoys working there and are not looking at jobsites during their break
12) Everything is so computerized,I don’t have anyone to speak to re HR issues
13) Trivia. The bro in law did his apprenticeship in this building with an architectural firm when they were building it many moons ago.
14) I am back surrounded by men. Its now choc bars and crisps instead of the usual black tea and handful of nuts!!
15) This is my first actual 9-5 job.Woowee!
16) Everyday I walk past a pound shop, where everything is £1. Today I bought a tube of toothpaste at 8.35am.
17) I have been a slave for nearly 5 years now.
18) I don’t actually know where my office is located in the grand plan of the building. There are no windows I can look out of.Another first.
19) I have access to flickr!!! Phew!!!I have no access to meebo,facebook,blogs,emails..well,most stuff.
20) I have been there more than a week, I only know how to get to the restaurant/cafeteria, my desk and toilets. And two exits out of the available 3.

ta-da! Its been keeping me busy and very tired indeed..but found out I am actually able to blog from work, so blogging schedule will probably be moved to lunchtime instead of 24/7 on call :).However, will probably do scheduled posts,like this one. But hopefully transmission is now back to normal

In other news, wifi is now working and we are now broadcasting live from bed!