taken off rotten.com
I’m on miserable day no. 2.Yes,yours truly is on a last-ditch diet to try to squeeze into her wedding dress.Grr.I remember the last time I went on a diet..nights was spent with maggie who was my diet buddy hanging out at the mamak drinking mineral water bitching over endless fags..that was until that woman started feeling faint and we had to stop the diet. No doubt I lost about 6kgs over the space of two weeks,but further efforts to repeat the diet has failed miserably…and due to my outrageous eating habits(daily buffet breakfasts) since me and Bacon got together, most of that effort had been erased – god I love my food.

I also remember the diet before last, where me and dreydrey had to stay away from human contact cause we were both on the stupid tuna diet – and that includes watching starwars at 9.30am and bringing a picnic with us to the cinema. Crazy people eating beetroot and cans of tuna in a cinema.But we did lose weight in that three days,just to have it magically come back again.I could not touch a tuna sandwich for 6 months.

So this cornflake diet thing is doing my head in.I’m perpetually hungry, I’m unhappy and I’m utilising the toilet for no.2 like it’s going out of fashion..all this fiber is apparently cleansing as it flushes it all outta you,but I’M STILL HUNGRY! It’s simple really.Two bowls of cornflakes a day, and a sensible dinner. Snacks are even allowed – preferably fruits. No need to cook, and prepare a normal dinner like you would usually eat. Seeing that I never have time to do breakfast before work, I only had one bowl of cereal during lunch, supplemented by yoghurt or fruits for the elevenses. Should help since I used to gorge on cherry pies,steak pies in the morning with bacon sanwiches on weekends – don’t ask.

I don’t think I can do this much longer – might need to supplement it with some leaves from my garden (its starting to resemble an edible salad patch!) and a boiled egg or two.Maybe a can of tuna. Maybe I should just come up with my own diet. Maybe I should just accept the fact that I will never look good in a bikini again…:(.Maybe looking like the pilsbury doughboy is not such a bad idea after all.

I hate diets. I hate skinny girls.

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